I think this is what we are supposed to do. I can see God's hand in all of this. I know we are not supposed to stop. I believe He will work things out for good. I can't say I am excited about the adoption at this point. I pray I get back there soon, but right now I am just not.
I have said from the beginning that this whole adoption is not about me. I am really feeling that now. If it was, I would quit right now. I would just stop at least for a few months, but it isn't. It is about a baby girl who needs a family to bring her home. So, I am choosing to fight against the worry, the doubt, and the insecurities that are going on in my head right now. I am going to fight for her.
More importantly, it is about bringing Glory to the one who gave His life for me, the one who died so that I could have eternal life. I pray that we will honor our heavenly Father with our decision to continue on with the adoption.
We truly can see God's hand at work in all of this. He has blessed us tremendously and for that we are thankful. We will be starting over with the adoption, but we won't have to do everything over. Hopefully, we will not have to redo our home study. We have no idea how long it will take. We don't have a clue when we will meet our daughter. God knows and His timing is perfect. I am sure of that!